My Dad and My Mom

Growing up, Mom said didely squat about Dad. Even when I asked her.

Nothing.

Mom, you fucked up. All I wanted was to know who he was, if he was real.

Well, he was real. And he had his story to tell.

You’re 80 years old mom. Don’t you think you should talk to your son about him?

The Most Horrifying Movie I’ve Seen

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Last night I watched this movie.

To see the projecting that Amy did on Nick was horrifying. I stopped the movie several times to regain my composure. It cut that close to my own memory.

Amy’s gaslighting is what did that marriage in. Her mental abuse destroyed Nick. Their job loss and relocation was no excuse to kill the relationship.

Borderline Personality Disorder is a terrible mental disease. To watch this movie frames my own experience of it in a way I hadn’t seen before.

Never again.

Thin Blue Line

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For the past two weeks, on two different fronts, we have been confronted with the unpleasant fact that there are people working in the institutions of our self-government who believe themselves not only beyond the control and sanctions of the civil power, but also beyond the control and sanctions of their direct superiors. We also have been confronted with the fact that there are too many people in our political elite who are encouraging this behavior for their own purposes, most of which are cheap and dangerous. In Washington, John Brennan, the head of the CIA, came right up to the edge of insubordination against the president who hired him in the wake of the Senate report on American torture. Meanwhile, in New York, in the aftermath of weeks of protests against the strangulation of Eric Garner by members of the New York Police Department, two patrolmen, Wenjian Liu and Rafael Ramos, were murdered in their squad car by a career criminal and apparent maniac named Ismaaiyl Brinsley. In response, and at the encouragement of television hucksters like Joe Scarborough, police union blowhards like Patrick Lynch, political zombies like George Pataki, and comical fascists like Rudolph Giuliani, the NYPD is acting in open rebellion against Mayor Bill de Blasio of New York, and the civil power he represents over them. This is an incredibly perilous time for democracy at the most basic levels.

Ed Kilgore – Washington Monthly

Burn this Bitch Down

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I have completely lost confidence in the criminal justice system after this latest travesty.

Cop violates protocol and strangles Eric Garner. It’s caught on video. Coroner rules it a homicide. Grand Jury fails to indict.

I have much to write about my personal experiences with “law enforcement”. It’s damming.

I’m sick and tired of running across pussy cops hiding behind their badges, their tactical gear, their attitude and their gun. Time to start doing something about it.

Cops need oversight. The police unions are shielding bad cops. We need to root them out so the good cops can do their job. So we can trust them once again.

End of a Season

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Baseball season ended last month for Douglas. I am humbled by the amount of work he put in.

He was the Shortstop and Team Captain on four different teams: the Atascadero Reds, the Atascadero Little League Travel Team, the Atascadero Little League All-Stars and the Atascadero Rivercats.

He attended 72 practices and scrimmages.

He played in 59 games.

Along the way he made a lot of new friends. All great players and kids.

Doug’s sports success is not indicative of what kind of parent I am. Having an athlete who is coachable, a great teammate, mentally tough, puts the work in, tries their best and brings joy to the game is what matters.

We’re both looking forward to Opening Day next Spring.

Stop Writing About Me

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November 11th was like most days for me. Late afternoon and I needed a break from the home office before I started dinner for the kids. I walked to the Santa Margarita Tavern and sat down in front of a beer.

A couple walks in. I recognize the guy as a fellow Little League parent from Douglas’s baseball team. We say hi to each other as they sat down at a table in the back corner.

A  few minutes later I turned around and looked over. I recognize the women sitting with him.

It was Karen Velie.

They were engrossed in discussion over a document, reviewing it page-by-page. I wanted to talk to Karen, but I didn’t want to interrupt their business. After 10 minutes, when it appeared they were done, I approached their table.

(In the interest of privacy, the guy’s identity is changed to John.)

Me: John, can you excuse us for a few minutes as I would like to talk with Karen.

Karen: I don’t want to talk to you.

Me: All I ask is a few minutes of your time Karen.

Karen: I don’t want to talk to you. Stop writing about me.

John: Kenny, I don’t want to get in the middle of this.

Me: John, that’s why I asked you to excuse yourself. So that you’re not involved in this.

Karen: Stop writing about me.

John: Do you want me to call the Sheriff?

Me: John, have I committed a crime?

John (pulling his cell phone out): Do you want me to call the Sheriff? Do you want to talk to them?

Me: Karen, why haven’t you called me back? You promised you would?

Karen: Stop writing about me.

With that said, I excused myself, left the establishment and walked home.

I’m Back

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Been a long time since this site was up. Last Spring Alex asked me to take it down.

I now know that was shorthand for “she didn’t like me anymore”. I didn’t need to take my blog down. It was a mistake to listen to Alex.

I got lots to talk about. Stay tuned.